Family Dynamics

There are 6 of us, 7 if you count our furbaby Layla, but back in the very beginning we used to be three.  Austin, Tay and I. 
Looking back the first years as a single parent with two little kids I think we did alright.  I remember taking them camping in a tent, complete with chopping wood and making bushpies over the fire.  I also remember changing a flat tire on the side of the road with a three year old clinging to my leg (I have to admit having my Dad on the other end of the cell phone talking me through it made it easier). I remember buying my first car and my first house on my own.

And then I met Bob...back in the early years it was easy to blend Bob into our family.  He loved making Tay giggle.  He and Austin got along well playing video games, watching hockey and playing mini-sticks.  But somewhere along the way over the years and through a new marriage and two new babies to our family something changed.
Austin and Bob no longer get along.  It's not even that "teenage phase".  It is beyond that.  It's tough for me as I am stuck in the the middle.  I love my husband and I love my son.  I want them both to love each other and I want a big happy family.  Simple enough request right? :)  It would be easier if I didn't remember all the good memories.  I remember in the early years Bob took Austin to his first Edmonton Oilers hockey game (Tay and I stayed in the hotel room and watched the game on the TV as she was too little to enjoy it).  The boys came back after that game so excited, talking loudly and animatedly about the game.  Austin had such a great time.  Laying in bed that night Bob told me that he got tears in his eyes watching the whole experience through Austin's eyes. I knew at that moment that he cared for me and more importantly he cared for my children.
I don't know when it happened, or even exactly what happened, but all of that has changed.
I now see the scowls on their faces when they are both in the same room together.  I hear the tones that they each use to speak to each other.  I am hardly an impartial third party, but I can see the faults in both of them and I am still holding out hope that one day they will realize how much it would mean to me for them to try to get some of the relationship back that they had.   

Until that happens I sit here just mere inches from insanity.