Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Deep Understanding

Funny how I wrote my last blog about grief.  I was reminded today how my grief has enabled me to understand more deeply.

This morning my brothers girlfriends father passed away suddenly from a heart attack. And just like that all the emotions from three years ago were right there. Before my Dad died I didn't understand that grief, that crippling pain, the feeling that you will never take a deep breath again. Now I understand what true grief consists of. I have empathy for what my brothers girlfriends family is going through but also for what my brother and mother are dealing with. This brings all the hurt to the surface.

I went to visit my Mom on Sunday at her new permanent room in the Melville nursing home. I felt a sense of peace and acceptance from her. I was very proud of how well she has adjusted to the changes over the past few months. Because she seemed more at peace with her life right now I too felt a sense of peace. I felt less anxious not only knowing my Mom was safe in a seniors home, but also relieved that she has found a way to accept where her place in life is right now. She is finding acceptance and happiness with where she is. Not always an easy feat so I am very proud of my Mom.

In the midst of the grief and the reminder of the loss of my Dad, I hope Mom can remember to appreciate what she has and love those around her.


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